Interview with Oderus (Dave Brockie) conducted by Bill Zebub for issue #6 of “The Grimoire of Exalted Deeds” magazine.
I have heard that thou art proud of the musicianship on ‘Ragnarok.’
We’re proud of everything we do, of course, being self-lustering, self-involved, egocentric assholes. We love what we do. We do what we love. We do what we can. We can what we do. And this time we’ve really gone and gone and done it!
Were there different musicians on the “Scumdogs” album?
We’ve had some line-up changes, yes, in the sense that the slaves that used to support us have now been reduced to pulp.
Thou taketh people from the audience and then mutilate them on stage?
Yes, and they beg for us to do it.
And thou art from another planet?
Yes. Thank you. Yes.
When thou taketh a member from the audience, thou art abducting the person.
In a sense.
But what goes on at thy shows is different from what I have read of alien abductions.
There have been abductions that occurred beyond what GWAR would do in its own naughty way. At our shows gray aliens have visited. It’s rumored they will do so on this tour.
Yes, and they will core my anus.
Ragnarok is an asteroid?
It is. It’s Doomsday Comet.
What role does it play?
Well, it plays a role in that it’s on a collision course to obliterate your planet, end your life, cease your evolution, and reduce this body unto dust. It will be colliding, scientists and top blunderers predict would be the downtown Los Angeles area somewhere around the end of the millennia, year 2,000. All the signs are pointing toward total devastation. We have here the end of the millennia. We have rock ‘n roll music. We have here nuclear bombs. And we have GWARI All the signs are there.
Thou art very eager to escape the earth.
It’s my fondest desire, yes.
Thy plan, last time, involved the world maggot. That did not proceed well.
We had a little bit of a problem, yes. Didn’t quite work out the way we thought it would. The only way I can possibly rationalize that Is by saying that there’s two world maggots. That was the wrong one. The other one will be coming out later. Now of course that doesn’t matter anymore because the comet is coming. So now we are poised to fall even more miserably than we did last year.
What is thy problem with censorship?
I would say it was more the other way around.
But thy cuttlefish was taken.
W ell yes, my penis was amputated. We got a lot of publicity out of that… probably the most frequently asked question. What if they cut off your penis in front of leering thousands at an A.T.F. rally?
The reason why I ask is, it is claimed that GWAR blows censorship out of proportion for It’s own popularity.
We never claimed anything. We just raped the pope, and then they cut off my penis. Censorship spensorship!
What is thy feeling about A.I.D.S. and its origins?
GWAR created it. I suppose I’ll have to take credit for it. This new disease we have is even better.
What is the new disease?
We don’t have a name for it yet. But you can get it just by looking at someone who has it. You get pimples all over that turn into boils that turn into warts, all within a matter of minutes. These bloat with rancid pus. It explodes. Stinking vapors belch out and giant carnivorous worms crawl out of the hole, eating you and then attacking your neighbors. Yes, you can even get it if the person who has it is on television.
Yes! We’re very proud of it . . . GWAR Laboratories, bringing it to you, to forge a new tomorrow.
What dost thou do to prevent breast cancer?
Chop them off, mount them, tickle them.
In the past thou hast had celebrities like Michael Jackson appear on stage. It was not very polite what was done to him.
I thought it was. We jacked him offl And then he blew his wad. And then we ripped his penis off. No. It wasn’t a real penis anyway.
But celebrities are not uncommon on thy tours.
Everyone wants to get their share of the limelight with GWAR.
Who might we see on this tour?
This year will be the worst yet. I don’t know quite who we’re going to have up there. There have been rumors of summoning the rotten corpse of Jerry Garcia.
That would be a realm thou hast not explored yet.
We’re very upset that he died before we could get our hands on him. We’re going to bring him back from the dead. He’s going to play an idiotic and meandering guitar solo and then we’re going to bash him in the head and rip him to bits.
When thou wert arrested and had thy cuttlefish taken, was Biff Buff present?
No, no. But I believe Cobb Knobbler was.
Is it true that thou hast smoked crack with the arresting officers?
Well no… Mexican quaaludes. We were doing gypinal that night.
Which state has done this to thee?
I think it was North Carolina. Terribly embarrassing. Please, can we change the subject?
I had to do a whole tour with a bloody stump.
Slymenstra Hymen once had her torch taken away from her and suffered a burn in the theft. Have other overzealous fans caused damage to GWAR?
No. I’d say it was definitely the other way around. Occasionally we have the bumbling idiot that might.get past security and thrash about on stage and grab a GWAR sword and try for the nearest exit. He is beaten mercilessly. Often I’ve had to pull the slaves off of people so I could have the honor of crushing their skulls.
Thou hast not changed much since thy early days, hast thou?
I’m committed to being the same. Every day I look in the mirror and I say, “Same! Same! Same!” It’s the shame of the same.
Is thy maker a god?
I’ve only seen his lips… his lips.and his sea of flame… the same lips that are on the credits on the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Thy maker, did he also make gloves?
Gloves? Who the fuck is that?
Well, I was wondering… if before thy creation people discovered thy maker’s intentions and protested, bearing signs that read, “MAKE GLOVES, NOT GWAR!”
That would be humorous if it had happened. But it had not, except on a lost episode of Celebrity Christmas.
There is always something that thou art. . . “against,” for lack of a better word. What is the present situation of mankind that aggravates thee most?
What we don’t like about mankind is mankind. The fact that they exist is enough to set us off on a genocidal holocaust that will engulf your world.
Thou art an epicurean. Thou dost enjoy sexual acts of all sorts.
I’m a blistering nub of clitoral pleasure.
How dost thou feel, since thou hateth mankind, and thou detest human breeding, about the pope spreading his command that there should be no birth control?
I think the pope should spread his cheeks. let little boys of Harlem pump shells into his ass.
Is he the only religious figure whom thou art against?
I will be against every religious figure, ramming my penis deeply Into them.
But the pope Is the only one, so far, whom thou hast bent over?
Oh I’d fuck God If I could only get Christ’s penis!