Monthly Archives: June 2024

Movie

Homework

I saw “Homework” during the era of VHS rentals. I was a pre-teen at the time, so I think the rental was through an older friend.

The movie was magical. As a pre-teen, I saw wondrous boobs. I fell in love with the blonde and was mesmerized.

As for Joan Collins, I didn’t know who she was. She had great tits, but her face reminded my of an ant. with a wide top of the head narrowing down to a tiny chin. Again, I was a pre-teen, so bear that in mind. I hadn’t seen boobs in real life, and I didn’t know that old women could have nice tits, so that was earth-shattering, ha ha. This was a movie that made me realize that an otherwise boring or bitchy woman could have immaculate breasts, so I should always keep that in mind in any encounter with such.

For some reason, this movie escaped my collection. I remember when I ravenously purchased movies that had only previously been seen on cable, theaters, or via rentals. I amassed a VHS library, later upgraded to DVD whenever possible, and then Bluray and 4K.

Homework is now available through Unearthed. For some reason, I only vaguely recalled that Joan Collins showed her boobs in this one, and I have seen many boobs since those times, in real life. I don’t mean to say that I am tired of boobs. A boob at any moment will freeze me in adoration no matter what. What I meant to say was that the boobs of Joan Collins are not more enticing than the boobs of someone who isn’t Joan Collins.

What I forgot was the blonde I wanted to marry. I don’t know if she was in any other movies. Perhaps I shall have to find out. Anyway, it was interesting seeing a girl who was at one time a woman in my eyes (because I was a pre-teen when I had a crush on her). She is now a girl in my eyes. I don’t mean an under-aged girl of course. She was an actress who played a younger character. It is almost like I am a ghost who can glance at any moment in the past, traveling time to experience lost moments with much greater awareness and knowledge in my current form.

One of the differences between modern movies and those of the eighties is, the characters who were teens could be naked in the past movies. I don’t mean that in a pedophile way.

It’s strange that even in a comedy, life is presented the way it is rather than the silly idealistic way that propagandists and human-resources styles ruin depictions of characters. I fully expect gangster movies to have mob bosses who reprimand underlings for using racial slurs. But yes, the drama in comedies of the past is vastly superior to many commercial films of this shallow era.

Show people how they are rather than how you expect people to behave in a corporate environment. It’s simple.

I was overjoyed to watch this and I marveled at the differences in my perception as an adult. It’s also interesting which parts I forgot and which parts I anticipated.

A newcomer will not, of course, be flooded with memories and having fallen in love with any of the characters, but this is a great time-capsule. Unlike the modern sex-comedies that have characters behaving unrealistically and striving to make a joke at every opportunity, this shows relatively average people going through their own experiences, sometimes funny, but never for the sake of a cheap laugh.

It’s worth seeing this difference in writing sensibilities.

There is an interview with the director, which reveals some bittersweet history of this movie. I don’t want to spoil anything, so I will just mention that this is a bonus chapter.

Again, I don’t know why I never pursued this movie when I was able to own it. Perhaps it was because I didn’t find Joan Collins attractive, except for her breasts. I had totally forgotten about the blonde who was was my imaginary wife. Perhaps it was too traumatic to admit that it was a love that could only exist in my head.

Movie

Amateur Porn Star Killer

When I saw this movie, many years ago, I was angry. At that time, I had not seen any found-footage flicks, so I couldn’t understand why footage of naked women would be shown with bad lighting and low quality.

My opinion of this movie has changed. Throughout the years I occasionally thought about re-watching it, but I couldn’t find it in my collection. As luck would have it, it became available from Wild Eye Releasing.

The first thing that I must note is that there is a hot blonde featured in consensual shots. She might be a prostite, girlfriend, or model. Her role is not explained. Even though this is found-footage, her shots are often overlaid as if they are flashbacks, but it is more likely that this is just footage shot with the same character who is the victim in this movie. I didn’t analyze this because I was too busy wishing for better quality footage of her, or find a way to marry her. Her scenes alone are worth the price of the movie.

I must pause here to share my wish that some behind-the-scenes footage would have been available for the re-issue, but I think that there was no other camera used.

Now back to the movie. The woman who played the role of the under-aged girl is talented. Of course, when I saw the scenes of her molestation and rape, I knew that she was over 18 in real life, but her performance was incredibly convincing. She’s got a great body, which might be a strange thing to say about a character who gets raped, but it allows me to make a point. A girl might blossom into a woman’s body, but she still has the mind of a child. Some men do not understand this. But getting back to her being sexy, the rational part of me knew that this was an actress, and I wanted to marry her. But I felt bad for the character.

What I missed about this movie when I saw it many years ago was that this is not lazy or gimmicky movie-making. During that era, talent-less black metal bands were recording songs on a four-track recorder, or even a boom box, and referred to the garbage as “Necro” which made me laugh at the people who were duped. There were even bands signed to record labels who pocketed most of the recording budget and paid the bare minimum at the worst recording studios. Knowing this, I had assumed that this was the same situation with “Amateur Porn Killer.” But my opinion has changed.

The villain of the movie takes advantage of a girl’s trust and brings her into a motel room. The found-footage style is perfect for capturing the way the situation changes. The dialogue may seem meandering, but I will bet money that key points were memorized before filming. If this were a narrative style, then the dialogue would be edited for pace, but in the raw style of this movie, you see a predator prepare his victim.

I don’t know if the creator knew about the subject beforehand or if he guessed how such a predator would behave, but equally skillful was the way the victim behaved. The movie is much more than what it appears to be at first glance.

In real life, there were two men who made a rape den. They recorded their crimes so they could enjoy the footage later. The documentary that featured this story showed some of the footage of the rapists, which was shot in a similar quality.

It seems that many horror fans are squeamish about this subject matter, which makes me laugh. They can watch people being murdered or tortured, but they are unable to watch rape scenes. Maybe the difference is that you are not supposed to glorify rape scenes. But horror fans brag to each other about kill scenes.

I feel regret for having dismissed this movie when I first saw it, but I am happy that I have re-discovered it. I was able to see how ignorant I was long ago. Or would it be better to say that I have seen a much wider diversity of movie since then?